Understanding Sex Addiction​
1. It’s more common than you think.
Studies suggest that between 3% and 6% of the population may struggle with compulsive sexual behavior. That’s millions of people — not a rare issue.
2. It's not about sex— it's about regulation.
Sex addiction isn’t really about sex. It’s about using sexual behavior to cope with stress, anxiety, trauma, or emotional pain — just like others might use alcohol, food, or shopping.
​3. It impacts relationships deeply.
Betrayal, secrecy, and emotional distance can seriously hurt partners and families. Many relationships survive — but only with honest repair, accountability, and support for both people.
4. It doesn’t mean you’re broken.
People struggling with sex addiction often feel deep shame, but this isn’t a moral failing — it’s a treatable issue. Recovery is possible, and you’re not alone.
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5. It's not always about porn.
While pornography is one form, sex addiction can also involve hookups, massage parlors, webcams, emotional affairs, or compulsive sexting. It's the compulsive pattern that matters, not the specific behavior.​
6. Partners need support too.
Betrayed partners often experience symptoms similar to PTSD, including hypervigilance, intrusive thoughts, and anxiety. Partners deserve healing too, not blame.
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7. Therapy works.
With the right support — including individual therapy, group support, and couples repair work — people can find lasting change, deeper intimacy, and emotional freedom.
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8. It often coexists with other issues.
Sex addiction can show up alongside depression, anxiety, ADHD, trauma, or substance use. A comprehensive approach is essential.​​
Treatment Questions
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1. What is the best treatment for sex addiction?
The best treatment for sex addiction is multifaceted and involves a combination of strategies, approaches, and sometimes medical intervention to ensure the specific needs of each addict is met. Treatment is centered on healing trauma, building healthy attachment, and breaking the cycle of compulsive behavior.
2. ​​Do I have to give up sex?
The goal of sex addiction treatment isn't to give up sex entirely, but to stop engaging in unhealthy sexual behaviors.
Similar to food addiction, treatment typically begins with a period of abstinence from all sexual activity. This break helps the brain recover from the intense chemical responses caused by addiction. As treatment progresses, individuals gradually learn to approach their sexuality in a healthier, more balanced way, focusing on building intimacy and connection rather than using sex as a way to escape emotions or stress.
3. How long does treatment take?
Treatment duration varies, depending on the severity of the addiction and the individual’s progress. Typically, it takes months or even years of ongoing support to maintain recovery, but the key is sustained commitment and effort toward long-term remission.
4. Does insurance cover my treatment?
We are "insurance friendly," which means that we serve as an “out-of-network” provider for all insurance companies. In our experience, this allows us to provide the highest quality of care, independent from insurance-based rules or decisions.
For out-of-network services, insurance companies will usually pay a portion of your spending, depending on your policy. If you decide to seek reimbursement, first ask your therapist about receiving a “Superbill”. This is a document you'd need to submit to your insurance company that includes the necessary information (such as diagnosis and treatment codes).
Once submitted, your insurance company may be able to reimburse you for the out-of-pocket cost you paid for services.
Relationship Questions
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1. My partner’s a sex addict. How will I ever trust them again?
Rebuilding trust takes time and effort from both partners. Through therapy and a commitment to healing, trust can be restored. It’s important to acknowledge the trauma caused by the addiction while remaining hopeful that recovery is possible with ongoing support and accountability.
2. I think my partner is a sex addict. What do I do?
Gently express your concerns to your partner and encourage them to seek therapy. It's crucial to approach the situation with understanding and support while also taking care of your own emotional well-being. Therapy for partners of addicts can be beneficial in navigating the relationship dynamics.
3. Should my partner and I do couples or individual counseling?
Both can be beneficial. Couples counseling can help improve communication and relationship dynamics, while individual counseling allows each partner to address their personal struggles, emotional needs, and healing. It’s important to find a balance between working together and focusing on individual growth.
4. Should my partner and I see different therapist?
Yes, seeing separate therapists is essential. This allows both individuals to receive personalized treatment while still engaging in couples counseling. It ensures that both partners’ emotional needs and healing journeys are addressed.
5. Can my marriage be saved?
Yes, many marriages can be saved with the right commitment, treatment, and support. Recovery from sex addiction is a long-term process, but with dedication, couples can rebuild trust and restore intimacy.
We offer discernment counseling to help couples determine the best path forward, whether that’s healing together or making difficult decisions about the future of the relationship. Seeking guidance from one of our experts can be invaluable in understanding your options and making an informed decision about your marriage.
Parenting Questions
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1. What do I tell my kids?
Be honest with your children in an age-appropriate way. Reassure them that they are safe and loved, while explaining that the family is going through a difficult time but is working together to heal. It’s essential to create a safe, supportive environment for them during this time.
2. Are my children safe?
The safety of your children should always be a top priority. However, sex/porn addiction and sexual offending are NOT the same thing. If the addiction has not endangered their physical or emotional well-being, you can focus on addressing the issue through therapy and ensuring a supportive environment for the whole family.